As I was cleaning out my room this weekend, I found a furry, little critter lodged in an old suitcase.
'What should I do with this...thing?' I asked myself as I lifted it up by it's ear.
'Me Love You. Goo,' replied the thing, in a loud voice reminiscent of Jennifer Tilly after the inhalation of some helium.
'Gah!' I cried, as I dropped the Furby back into the case from whence it came.
The top flap of the suitcase fell closed from the force of his fuzzy little body landing within, but I could still hear the muffled shouting of the mini-beast. 'Cock-a-doodle doo! Furby!' he cried.
Naturally I decided to bring this little ragamuffin into work to play a prank on the prank master, Zach Chin. My plan was to hide the Furby somewhere in the office where his bi-lingual declarations of love (he speaks both English and Furbish) would surprise, startle and perhaps shock Zach so much that he would emit a funny sound of astonishment. That was my plan. It was simple and my goals were reasonable. I put on my sneaky face, grabbed my Furby and set off to make some magic happen.
But where should Furby be stationed? I brought Alli Ball in on the action, and together we went about seeking the perfect location for Furbs to carry out his stealth mission.
Would he be most effective in the fridge?
Nope. The fridge is too cold, and Furbys come from tropical climates (at least, I imagine they do because he came with a pamphlet that said he hails from a place called 'Furby Island' and that sounds tropical to me). Perhaps he could hang out in the little boys room?
Actually, that would be WAY too dangerous for the little guy. He and I were pretty close at that point, and I could tell that Alli was starting to like him too. An afternoon in our office's bathroom is NO way to treat a new friend, trust me. We needed to place him somewhere warm, safe and where Zach would never suspect a small cousin of Gizmo to be lying in wait...
So we placed the Furbinator beneath Zach's desk, switched him ON, and tried to quiet him down as he began a rousing rendition of 'Twinkle, Twinkle, Goo La La.'
About half an hour later, our target arrived. Alli and I crept over to his office door, and waited until we heard the cheerful 'Me FURBY!' (at which point we burst into giggles and ran back to our office).
Zach, however, was nonplussed. He didn't even flinch. It's almost like he expected a white, head-sized gremlin to be waiting for him this morning. I felt foolish. I felt exhausted. I felt beaten. My prank was totally lame. I think the success of this attempt is clear from the expression on Zach's face:
And then, to add insult to injury, Furby doesn't even love me anymore. He's all about Zach now. Jerks.
Editor's Note: Furbys are apparently dangerous, and one should not take their kind lightly. According to Wikipedia, 'Furbys had wiring problems causing the Furby's fur to burn as smoke rises.'